Be The Elephant Today

This morning I reflect on something I heard from one of my mentors and coaches, and it centered on listening. We all understand how important listening is, but knowing we should listen and knowing how to actually listen are two very different things.

He used a metaphor that hit me right in the heart. He said the difference between an elephant and a hippo is simple. An elephant has big ears and a small mouth. A hippo has small ears and a big mouth. And if we want to grow, lead, love, and connect well, we have to choose which one we want to be.

Be the elephant.

One thing he pointed out is that we can pay attention to the balance between the statements we make and the questions we ask. We grow when we ask more questions than we make statements. And not closed questions that carry hidden judgments. But open questions that draw out the heart of the person in front of us.

Listening with curiosity

Listening with patience

Listening without assuming

Listening without preparing our next response

Listening with the intent to understand

When I practice being an elephant with Bella, I remember that she is watching my example. As a parent it is so easy to slip into judgmental questions or correction based statements. But I want to be the dad who listens with openness, presence, and intention. I want Bella Love to feel heard and safe when she speaks.

And when I practice being an elephant with Barbi, I remember that listening is one of the greatest gifts I can give her. Asking supportive, gentle, open questions. Not questions shaped by frustration or assumption. Questions shaped by love. By wanting to understand. By wanting to sit with her heart, not correct it.

So today I am reminded to be the elephant

To listen more than I speak

To ask more than I assume

To paraphrase what I hear

To lean in with love

To respond with intention

To be present with my family and with every person I meet

This is my reflection for the day.

To lead well I must listen well.

And to listen well I must choose to be the elephant.