A Final Reflection Before the New Year

A Final Reflection Before the New Year

As my final reflection of the year, I find myself looking back at everything 2025 contained. All the stories. All the moments. The good, the bad, the joyful, and the painful.

I think about my writing, the stories I tell, the way I speak, and the things I create for people. Some people connect deeply with it. Some people do not. And that is part of my identity as a creator. My work becomes a kind of resume, not on paper, but in lived experience. Sometimes it surprises me what comes out of me. Some days I feel clear and aligned. Other days I feel off, uncertain, and not quite where I want to be.

There were moments this year when I felt crushed, and moments when I felt on top of the world. When I look back at the story 2025 tells me, I realize that many of the habits, roles, and attachments I carried through the year do not need to come with me. Some of that weight felt valuable at the time, but now I see it was only preparation for something greater that is still unfolding.

For those who know the full story, you know that everything was taken away from me. The question I had to ask myself was simple but honest. Am I still here?

I am.

I still have Barbi. I still have Bella Love.

So who am I without the titles, the roles, and the things that defined me in 2025 but no longer exist? I believe I am being shaped into a better version of myself. A more grounded version. A more intentional version.

That version of me is focused on the next assignment, not the last one.

Now the questions become practical. What habits do I need to build? What small daily inputs will prepare me for what is coming next? What am I actually trying to create?

At the heart of it all is desire. What do I want to achieve, and why? That question matters more than any outcome. When the why is clear, the inputs become easier to define. Writing it down matters. Spending time with it matters.

This reflection is not just for me. It is for anyone reading this.

Write down what you want to achieve. Identify the habits and inputs you need to practice consistently. Be honest about what is holding you back. If something no longer serves you, let it go. Release what was. You do not need to depend on the past version of yourself to build what comes next.

The real question is this. What abilities do you need to replace what you have lost?

Growth does not come from clinging to what was taken away. It comes from creating, connecting, and contributing in new ways. Preparation matters. Reflection matters. Learning how to move forward without crutches matters.

This is a season of stripping things down to the essentials. Removing what is no longer useful. Cleaning up the inside. Taking out the trash. Making space.

My prayer and hope is that Barbi and Bella Love do the same. That they release what no longer serves them and replace it with what will strengthen them. And my hope is that anyone reading this enters the new year with clarity, safety, and intention.

How we exit 2025 is how we enter 2026.

My hope is that the year ahead is marked by growth, discipline, and consistency. Not perfection, but progress. Not noise, but clarity. And most importantly, a strong and honest why. Because when the why is clear, it becomes the fuel that guides the habits, the preparation, and the direction forward.

I am grateful to be surrounded by people who support me, encourage me, and hold me accountable. I have Barbi and Bella Love. I have friends and family who check in and help me see whether I am moving in the right direction.

That is how I close this year. With gratitude. With intention. And with trust that what is coming is being prepared, even now.

Here’s to letting go, cleaning up, and stepping forward with purpose.